Communication, Curiosity, and Being an Experience Expert with Dr. Amy Mathews-Perez

What's going on everybody? I hope this finds you striving and thriving and doing absolutely amazing. today's podcast is pretty awesome. We have Dr. Amy Matthews Perez is a guest. And let me tell you, she brings so much joy and laughter to this conversation. But she also brings so much wisdom. And she has over 30 years of experience and education. And with all of that time, she's had positioned as an educator, and assistant principal, a principal, director of special programs, and more. And with all of those different roles, she's been able to see the field of education through many different lenses. And this gives her a unique perspective. And in this conversation, she drops so many great takeaways on communication, leadership, being a lifelong learner, and so much more. I think you're going to absolutely love this conversation with Dr. Perez. This is gonna be a fantastic interview everybody. I want to welcome Dr. Amy Perez to this show. How are you today there, Dr. Perez? I am good. Brian, thank you for having me on your podcast, I appreciate the risk you're taking. And having someone that's not necessarily well known or famous yet, appreciate that. Well, I like to yet part. And I also want to say that you we can learn from everybody. And I know 100% that our listeners are going to take away a lot from you. Because you've worn a ton of hats, you have a ton of knowledge, and you bring a lot of great energy. So I can't wait for the listeners to get a chance to listen to your wisdom. Now. Can you tell everybody a little bit about your background? I can I'm born and raised in Texas, I went to college originally to be a classroom teacher knew back in fifth grade that I wanted to work with students with special needs. I didn't know how. But I knew that that was the plan. And again, went to college to be a classroom teacher. Did that decided I also wanted to be a speech pathologist. So I did that while I was teaching, went on and became a certified principal, served as an assistant principal, I've served as the director of special programs worked in four different districts. This is my I think it's my 30th year Brian and public education. It might be my 31st. But really after 28, who's who's counting, they all blend together? Absolutely. And now I'm a director of special programs, one of which is special education. And I love what I do, I love what I do, I love the fact that it's come full circle that what I knew to be true, although I didn't know when or how in fifth grade, I knew what I knew what happened has come full circle. And now that's what I do I work for and with students with special needs. That's great. And with all the hats that you've worn, you've seen a lot, and you have a lot of knowledge. And being the director of the special programs. What do you wish all of us in education knew? Well, what I wish everyone knew, and I'm going to talk about special education specifically, because the other programs have names that will raise more questions than they will answers. So I'll focus on special education. But I wish what everyone knew is that special education doesn't mean something, something more. It doesn't mean it has to be special because you're adding to special education, it just means that it's unique. It's meeting the needs of people. And what makes Special Education special, Brian are the people, the people that are willing to do the work to meet the needs of an individual. And I liken it to food left. I mean, just think about it. If you're going to go to McDonald's and get a burger, you're going to get what they serve you most of the time. But if you're in Texas, and you want a burger made to order, you're gonna go to water burger. So when you order your burger, my guess is it's not the same as mine because I'm gonna say no tomatoes, no ketchup. So that makes my burger special. Brian, not anything extra is just unique to what my needs and wants are. So that's the analogy I always have for special education. It doesn't mean we have to do more. It doesn't mean it has to cost us more time or money or energy. Do, we just have to know what the needs are and meet the needs. So that's probably one of the biggest things that I will want everyone to realize, along with the fact that there is no such thing. I'm gonna say this again, there is no such thing. As a special education student. There are students that have special needs, but they are students first. So there's no such thing as an LD student, or an ed student, they are students with a learning disability or students with an emotional disturbance. Brian, just like you, and I don't want to be called by our shortcomings. You know, I don't you don't want to be called bad temper. Brian, do you? Absolutely not. And not that you have a bad temper, I just made that up. But nobody wants to be called by their shortcomings or their challenges first. So that's probably the second thing I would want everyone to know is that everyone is a student, first a student with gifts a student with talents, but their students first. I love that. And I love that analogy you gave and recognizing, you know that they have gifts, that they are special in their their own ways. And we got to be careful about the labels that we place on them. And that's one thing that, you know, I named the podcast teaching champions, because in part, the champions is calling our students champions. And each and every single one of us one of them, not just the ones that academically sore, or they connect with you right away every single student, every single student in our schools, because the way we view them, that affects the way we talk to them, it affects the expectations that we put on to them. And I absolutely love what you said, How about how they are so special? And it's all about knowing their needs, and how do we meet their needs, right? It's investing in them as a person. And but it's also just investing even with our co workers, we're all special in the way I look at it, we're all special, just in a different way. So if you take us out of our education, brains, and you think of someone in your life, that, Oh, they're so special to me, well, that has a different meaning than when you put special in front of the word education. And that meaning when you think of someone in your life, that special is what I want everyone to think about when they think of every student because we're all special. You as a teacher, you have needs that are unique, that make you a better teacher. So what is your campus administration or district administration doing to meet your needs, it's the same thing. It's the same thing. But it's hard. It's hard work. Don't get it twisted, it's hard work. And not everybody is invested enough to do the work. But that's what special education is to me. I love that. And I love how you bring up looking at our colleagues and seeing their shine, what are their gifts and seeing them for that, because that's important to the magic can happen when we find out what people's strengths and joys are. And then we align that with the duties and their role of their job. That's that's kind of when the magic happens. I mean, I enjoyed being an assistant principal, it brought a certain set of joy. I enjoy being a principal, I enjoyed being a classroom teacher. That's where I got all my funny stories. Well, that's not true, I got some from being an assistant principal and a principal. But you have to align your passion and your skill set with your job, or you know what they say, if you do what you love, you don't work a day in your life. So that's kind of where the, that's the hard part is aligning all of those things. Because some people are not in tune with what makes them happy. They may not be in tune with what their passion is yet. You just never know. But aligning those things is where I have seen the magic happen. I love that. Now, part of your role is being a great communicator, and what are some ways that you be a better communicator for the employees in your district? Well, I have a professional email address, which I shared with you earlier, but I also have a private one and it's talked a lot amy@yahoo.com So that should tell you right there. As a speech pathologist, I do talk a lot. So I tend to over communicate, but I do have some systems in place. One very small example Brian is I send a Monday email every Monday to my assessment team. I mean, whether they like it or not, they're getting an email that says the subject is what Monday emails very original. And in there are just some updates and don't forget, maybe we're celebrating somebody's birthday. I've been known to throw in a corny joke or four. I love corny jokes, but it's consistent. So to me, communication works when it's consistent and clear. And The other thing that makes communication effective is being a listener, and being willing to revise your communication strategies to meet the needs of your team. So I'll give you an example. I was sending out a Monday email every Monday, or Tuesday, right? If it was a holiday than I originally called it, the Monday, Tuesday email. And one of us, one staff member said, you know, it's hard to go back and find things that we need, because they're all titled, Monday email. And I said, well, thank you for that. Because I never thought of that as the sender. I was trying to be consistent. And what happened, it turned out to be confusing. So at that person suggestion, I create a Google Doc. So now what I do, and what do you think the title of the Google Doc is brand? Monday? Yeah, yes. But what I do is every Monday email, I copy and paste into the Google Doc. So now, all they have to do is scroll the Google Doc, instead of trying to figure out which Monday email it was. So a key part of communication, in my opinion is listening. And being willing to revise the strategies that you're using to meet the needs of the people that you're working with. I can give you another example. When I was a principal, I would text people, text staff, we all text it, it wasn't a big deal. But for some reason, and I understand it, I'm not that far out of the classroom. If I would text a teacher and say, Can you come by and chat? Dun, dun, dun, they assume something was wrong. Although it was just as friendly and low key as I could possibly make it. So one teacher came to me and said, you know, if, every time you text me, I think I'm in trouble, of which I made a joke. Right? Well, have you done something that you need to be in trouble about? That you need to tell me about which of course, that person had not. But she asked me, could you put a smiley face at the end of the text just to reassure me that I'm not in trouble? And I was like, absolutely. So again, being willing to revise your communication strategies to meet the needs of the people you're working with? Can make communication exceptionally effective. Absolute? Absolutely. And I'm reading right now, a book by John Maxwell. And if the listeners don't know who John Maxwell is, he's one of the top business leaders out there unbelievable speaker. And he has a ton of bestseller books. And the one I'm reading right now it was I think it's the something laws of indisputable teamwork, or something along that lines. And one of the those 17 laws is a law of communication. And I love how you talk about communication being consistent, that it's clear. And one of the big things that John Maxwell said with the communication piece is that listening to others that we all love to talk, but being able to sit and listen to others. And really, I love how you talked about you listen to your colleagues. And whether it was putting that all the information into the Google Docs, or that little emoji smiley emoji, just so that they know that it's nothing bad. I think that's huge. And where there's a void in communication, I think a lot of problems happen because people start making up their own stuff, or they go out on a lot of how rumors start, or in discrepancies can happen. So I love what you're doing here with this. Well, I appreciate that. And I have I also love Maxwell, and I subscribe to the minute with Maxwell. And if you don't do that, that's a fabulous thing where he will send you an email every every morning, I believe. And it's a one minute video of him talking about some skill, or some word and how to apply it, you know, to your life or your practice or your business, whatever it so minute with Maxwell is a great free subscription. And the other thing about communication, Brian, is I encourage people to ask questions, because if you assume that I know that's not the right thing to do. Because I don't know, I never assumed that I know everything. So I tell people I would rather you ask me 15 The same question 15 times, then guess once because that one guess is going to take us so long to fix or clarify or whatever verb you want to use. So ask questions. I need you to ask questions. That's how I know you are learning. And it creates an opportunity for me to learn. And I also check my ego at the door. I have something that I say a lot at work and I say you know it's not ego, it's we go, we are a team. We gotta check that ego at the door. It's not about you. It's not about me. It's about the student and the family. So what are we going to do as a team to provide better this that or whatever it is, so I'm also very visible. I'm very accessible, and I am more than ready, and a very well versed in the fact that I can admit when I'm wrong, or that I can admit that I don't know. But I promise not to make it up, I promise to go find out and I will get back with you. So asking questions is huge, in my opinion and keeping communication clear. That's great. And what what I think that you do a really good job of is, you welcome those questions, and you make it so that your staff knows that you want those questions, and that you're easy to talk to. So, you know, as a leader, I think it would be great to send that message to the staff that comment. And let me know what your question is. And for us who are underneath you to check that ego at the door, say, I need a little clarification on this. And I love that it's not the ego. It's we go. That's absolutely right. That's what I say all the time. And it's, it's for me, too. I mean, I, what I intended, may not be the message that you got. So if it's not you, I just made a ROM it's not what you got, you have to come and ask me, you don't have to, I would like for you to come and ask me even if it's to say, Did I understand you to say dot dot dot? Super important? Because you're right. That's how presumptions get made. That's how mistakes get made. So I might be an overthinker. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I am. And that leads to over communicating. But again, if the goal is serving students and families, I'm okay with that, because we got to be on the same page, and we got to do what's best for them. Absolutely. And I, I think being over communicators, a good thing, being part of the head of a program, a big piece that probably you try and do is build that school community up. Now, what are some ways that you try and support and build your staff up? Well, I get to know them personally, like little personal things about them, there's always room for improvement, let me just preface it with that, because I'm not perfect, but I get try to get to know them personally, you know, during COVID, it was really hard. But I try to plan things that we can do outside of work, so that we can see each other as a whole person and not just the job that we do. I also am very visible, Brian, I'm very accessible. I have something I have a picture saved on my phone that says work hard enough to where you no longer have to introduce yourself. So that's kind of one of the mental mantras I keep. I participate in activities with folks, I support them at their activities as much as I possibly can. I try to be a support across the board, not just in areas that I work directly with. So if I need to be on the campus, and you know doing cafeteria duty, or bus duty, or whatever it is, I am visible and accessible and happy to do that. Because that's, that's how you build relationships with people. And that's how you can support people. Because just like when we talked about the students, you have to know the people that you work with, in order to be able to support them effectively. So one of the other things that I talked about is there's a certain comfort level when we provide what we think is support for other people. But that makes us feel good. The hard work is when you learn and you figure out what does that person need as far as support versus what are you going to offer. And that takes a lot of intentional effort. And a lot of people don't do that. So it's important to me to build those relationships with people so that when I can support them, I can support them in a way that's effective for them. For example, some people might like getting a thank you note, write a handwritten thank you note, another person might want a social media, thank you note with a picture. So I mean, that's a silly example. But you have to know the people that you're working with in order to support them effectively. Some of them want accolades. Some of them don't. Some of them, you know, want you to come in and fill in and cover their duty. Some of them don't you just have to know the people you're working with in order to support them effectively. Yes, there's there's so much right there that I love and that relationship piece, talking about going out and being very visible. And I'm reading a book by Dr. Joe San Flippo. Right now, I don't know if you know who he is. I think it's I know him i yep, I follow him and Jimmy Costas on the weekly show. When they started that and follow him on Twitter, He is hilarious. I love his cricket bike check. He's just so real. That's what I really really enjoy about him is everything he says, is so authentic. It's not I mean, yes, you wrote a great book, right? This is what you meant. And, but when he speaks, it's just authentic. It's not, quote unquote, book learning it's real application. It's practical. I just, I just really enjoy everything he has to teach us, especially with his one minute walks. If you haven't seen those, Oh, those are fabulous. 100%. And, yeah, he's so down to earth, he comes across, so down to earth, and like you said, it's applicable, he's in the trenches. And in this book, he was talking just like you, are you talking about being visible. And it's not just being visible, per se for the teachers, but being visible for every single person that's in the school system, because it's not, you know, it's just not teachers, per se, in the schools. Every single person in school doesn't function without the secretaries, the paraprofessionals, the nurse, the cafeteria workers, the custodians, the bus drivers, we need everybody. And he's talking about, just like you said, building those relationships with every single person. And I also love and it's super important how you said, we need to understand take that time understand how people like to be communicated with because everybody is different. And whether some person likes that handwritten note. Some people might like that praise in front of a group, where other people might not like that praise. And the faculty meeting would rather one on one or social media posts. So understanding the people that you work with and how to connect with them. That's, that's fantastic. Well, and I, I'm all about practical, I'm probably too practical for my own good to be perfectly honest. Because if I'm going to do something, it better apply to something, it better help somebody. I'm not about fluff or, or busyness, I want to get in the trenches and get the work done. I mean, I've been known to ride the bus. I mean, I'll drive it except I don't have the license. So they're not gonna take that risk on me. But I've been known to ride the bus, especially when I was a campus administration, I had no problem ran that bus, helping those families and those students out. One time we, when I was a principal, you know, you have the it was an elementary school, and you've got the families that pick up kids after school. Well, I've been trying to get in touch with a mama. And she had just been hard to get a hold of I get it, we're all busy. So I went out to the pickup line and went around the block, and got in her car at the back of the school. And we had our conference all the way up to the front door. And when she pulled up, and her son opened the door, open the door, and I was in the car. That was that was a moment for him. That was a moment but you do what needs to be done to communicate. And, you know, clarity of communication is another really, really big thing for me. Again, I probably over communicate, but I need it to be clear so that we can take action and make progress instead of just kind of treading water. And what did she mean? How What did she mean? I'm not sure what she meant? It? Did she think that is she thinking that it just I don't need all that. Let's just be clear and concise, but positive. Now, I'm also all about efficiency. Brian, I love acronyms. Maybe that's why I love being in special education. But acronyms are my thing. I mean, even my initials, Amy Matthews better as I go by amp to a lot of people. I love some acronyms. That's just where my brain goes. I mean, I remember one time a long time ago, my husband and I were at a party and I was like TTG he's like what, and I'm like time to go. He's like, just say it baby. You don't have to use acronyms and every part of life. I love you, but just say it, babe. So I do love some acronyms, because I'm all about efficiency, also a practical and I like to be efficient. Efficient is a better way of saying impatient I think. But I love it. I love it works. absolutely does. Now, can you tell the listeners because the next question I want to ask you is about growing and getting all the knowledge. And you are someone that has never stopped? I think I think the you are the perfect example of being a lifelong learner. Before you answer this question, can you just tell everyone, like your educational background? Well, I've been in college, I was in college for more than 25 years because I always found something else I wanted to do. So even if it was one class a semester or one class a summer 13 years into my marriage when I got my master's, my doctorate scuze me and my loving husband said Please tell me you're finished. Is that even in college, our whole third the first 13 years of our marriage, I said I'm finished. I love to learn. So I got my bachelor's in secondary ed from University of North Texas. I'm not going to remember all these details by the way, so I may just be And I got my master's at Baylor in speech pathology, Speech Pathology and Audiology. I got mid management, I think that was at Tarleton State, these are all here in Texas went to Kingsville, Texas a&m Kingsville, excuse me. And then I got my doctorate at Texas a&m Corpus Christi. And I think that's about it. But I was in college for quite a few years, just because I'm so curious. That's another good cover word. I'm just so curious, I want to learn, I want to know more. Because the more I know, the more I can share with other people, I don't want to be the stop place for the knowledge, I want it to flow through me into other people. Because I want to help other people, I want to empower other people to be their best self, and to see their best qualities. And my learning, they can do that for themselves. And then it just keeps going over and over. And all those dominoes fall and everybody gets better. But I have an insatiable curiosity for learning. And I, literally insatiable. And I love that. And I love how you you said right there, that the learning doesn't stop for you, then maybe that's why you're so passionate about and why you've never stopped is because like you said, it just flows. It's not. We're not just learning for ourselves, but we're learning to share and lift others up. Now, if I'm not learning something new, I get very, very bored. Which you can feel sorry for my husband, because I'm always learning. I'm always wanting to try this. And try that. And let's go do this. And let's have that we read this book, and how about we do have that we try that. But if I'm not learning, I'm bored. So again, this podcast with you is a huge learning experience for me. So I'm so grateful that you're part of my learning journey. And thank you so much for teaching me about podcasting, and just giving me a chance to learn about it. Oh, well, I'm thanking you right now. Because for sharing all your wisdom, and your joy and your energy, I love it. So but going off of that, you haven't stopped learning. So with it being summer vacation, some great time for us to slow it down a little bit. And to really dive into building some of that knowledge or even some inspiration, motivation. What are some things that you would recommend to others? Well, the first thing I would say, Brian, is that I do see myself as an educator. But that is a part of who I am. So I want to encourage everybody educator, not that you are not your job. So work to build or improve whatever part of your whole life that you want to focus on, work to learn more about yourself. So I've got some recommendations that I have, but know that they're not all education based. Because, yes, I'm an educator. And that's where my heart and my mind are. But that's not all I am. I feel like I can contribute to the community to society to the world as a whole as more than an educator. So one of my favorite authors is Jon Acuff, he's got a fabulous book called soundtracks. It's an easy read. I think I've read it three or four times already. It's fabulous. It's not education base, but it's awesome. It'll, I don't want to give it away. You just got to read it soundtracks by Jon Acuff and then I listened to his podcast, which is called All it takes is a goal. One of the reasons I really like him is because he writes like, he speaks kind of like, Joe Sanfilippo. Very practical, he's got a great sense of humor. I love a good sense of humor, I seek laughter I, I can make almost anything funny in what I call my AMI brain. And then, like his last podcast was with that Valerie Burton. And it was it was great. So his podcast called All it takes is a goal is really great. I also have read thrive through five by Jill Siler that is education based, but it's just a great book. I've also read that a couple of times. I just finished reading Kim viridans fight song, which is a great book about enduring and finding, finding your light and finding your passion and your purpose. And then I'm currently reading revisionary thinking by Courtney Clark, which is another great book about I'm just going to read you the subtitle. Yeah. When you have to change your plans to reach your goals. I mean, it's a great but again, not education based, but it's a great book. And I usually have I feel guilty about saying this five or six books going at the same time, and I kind of flipped back and forth between the books. And then of course, I listen to your podcasts. And that's probably and there's one more recommendation I have Jim quick. And he's got a book out called limitless. And you talk about, wow, wow. He taught he teaches you how your brain works. It's not scientific. It's not a heavy read. Don't let that scare you. But it is amazing. It is amazing. It's called limitless by Jim quick. It's a great, great book. Awesome. And, you know, I've second anything by Jon Acuff. I've read soundtracks and lists multiple times, and his podcast is top notch. Yes. And I haven't read Jimmy quicks book, but it's been on the on the list. And I'm kind of like you, I always have like three or four books go on at one time. You know, you get into different mood for different things, and everything. But that is a great list. I've seen a bunch of people talk about Kim viridans book. And then I think it's good to read outside the education field, too. Because Absolutely, because we're a whole person works for an educator. Absolutely. But how do you become a better a better educator, you become a better educator by just being well rounded. So I know a lot of people will like to just just define themselves as an educator, which is fabulous. But realize there's more to you than that. So you got to feed all those areas of who you are. Because you can contribute to society in the world in ways other than being an educator, whether it's a teacher or a campus administrator, or a district administrators, or a district administrator, excuse me, you can contribute to other parts of society. It does not have to be through the funnel of education. Absolutely not. Yeah, I was just having a conversation with a friend about that, that sometimes we get boxed into that mentality that we're, we're such a it's becomes our whole identity being a teacher, or an educator. But each and every single one of us is so much more than that. Now, is there one or two takeaways from those books or anything else that you've read recently, whether it's from Dr. Joe Sanfilippo, or Jimmy casas, that have really stood out to you recently? Well, what I have in my notes from Jon Acuff podcast with Valerie Burton, really, it's, I took a picture of it on my phone. So now it comes across on my Apple Watch, that's what I did with the inspirational things. It, they were talking about Valerie Burton was talking about positive emotion is a success strategy. And I had to I had to listen to that a few times and write it down. Because I'm pretty guilty of having the silver lining attitude I can find, you know, good news. In bad news, I can find the silver lining. Sometimes it's a curse. Sometimes it's a curse, but most of the time, it's not. But I know toxic positivity is something that's going around. And so when she said that, that positive emotion is a success strategy, that was very interesting to me. So obviously, I kept listening. And what I took away was when she said, Learn to tell yourself, I'll be happy while dot dot dot, instead of I'll be happy when.dot.so. Let's just use a silly example. Instead of saying, I'll be happy when I win the lottery. You can say, I'll be happy while I buy my lottery tickets. So it's just the one word switch is what they talk about on that podcast, and how it can impact as Jon Acuff says the soundtracks, one word switch, it can change everything. So that's probably the most recent one that I would share with you from that podcast. Absolutely. I love that right there. And it's amazing, like one word, just the way that we frame something in our mind the difference that that can make? Well, and I'm a word nerd, Brian, I guess you would assume that as a speech path, but I'm a word, nerd. My favorite word used to be ubiquitous. It's now switched to effervescent. And amygdala. Those are my new favorite words. I know they're silly, but they make me happy. And amygdala has my first name and the first three letters. So who's, who's not gonna like that? That's a perfect word. Yes, I do love. I love language. And I'm a word nerd. And I do Wordle and I do Squirtle. I do all of that language stuff. Now math. I'm not that great at math yet. It just happens to be the first four letters of my maiden name. That's about as far as it goes with me in math. because math is just so absolute. Right? You're either right or wrong. Whereas language, it's an open box. It's a lovely thing, but I'm a big word nerd. So yeah, that one word switch really, really hit home with me. I love that. Now, we're coming off. What a lot of educators think is the toughest year that ever they've ever gone through. And I think it's important for each and every single one of us, number one, and we've talked a lot about that, but understanding ourselves being self aware. But, you know, I'd say that's number one. But number two, understanding how other people have gotten through those hard times, and what can we take from those people? So in? I think it's a big mistake for us just to say, well, last year was the toughest year, and this year is going to be so much better that no matter what, there's always going to be difficult moments, there's always going to be those tough days. So how did you get through this past year and keep that positive mindset? Well, I have the natural propensity to be positive, like I've mentioned earlier, but I have labeled myself and Experience Expert, because I learn from every experience, and I'm an expert of my own experiences. That's what that means. So I every experience that I have, I take something from it now. Yes, a lot of the times is what not to do, or how I messed that up. So I can do better next time. But I see every experience as a learning opportunity. So yes, it was difficult. I have lots of stories about that. We didn't even have Wi Fi where we were during COVID. And then it's it's a long story. Yes, it's difficult, but what am I learning from that? What am I learning that's going to, you know, hate that phrase, make me a better person, but what am I going to learn from that, that I can share with other people? So it was tough, but I saw every experience as what can I learn from it, even the negative experiences, you know, after you get through the sadness, or the trauma, you know, what can we learn from that, that we can share with other people? How can we use that to improve whatever it is our attitude? Our perspective? You know, was it a curve in our journey? Or was it a sharp turn? And where did it lead us? And what are we going to do with it, I'm going to use everything to benefit me. So it can flow through me so I can use it to benefit other people. So that's kind of how I got through it, I just see everything as a learning opportunity. And like I said earlier, almost to a fault. I'm a silver lining kind of gal when I was working on my doctorate, I figured out that I can explain away a lot of things for people. And again, almost to the point of a fault. Even you know, if you're in traffic, and somebody cuts you off, my natural instinct, as sad as this may sound is, oh, they must have had a bad day. You know, I just give grace, oh, they must be late for work. You know, like me driving to get to this appointment, I was going pretty fast. And I wanted people to give me grace. But I always can come up with a reason while they're doing that. And it's usually filled with grace. So I mean, it was a hard year but circling back, and I don't mean to be repetitive. I worked on knowing how I could support people, whether it was a text checking in on them, whether it was answering their questions, when they had questions, whether it was taking them a meal, even though I don't cook, that would have been something I bought, Cook is not anything I do my here's my rule, Brian, it's probably too personal, but I'm gonna share it with you. If it takes me longer to cook than it takes you to eat. I'm not doing it. So there's my role. Now, my husband knew that when he married me, so that's not a surprise. And I don't also don't like to cook, Brian, because I'm not good at it yet. And I'm not willing to take the time or energy to get better. So it is what it is. But that's how I got through the hard times helping other people in ways that were effective for them. And seeing okay, what have I learned from this? What can I learn from this? How can I improve my skill set? What new strategies have I learned? I mean, I learned more about technology during the COVID than I probably learned a long time. But look how it's benefited me. I didn't know a whole lot about zoom before COVID. So just that silver lining kind of attitude. I'm trying to find what can I learn from every experience? And that's why I call myself an experienced expert. I love that. And you know, you talked about leading with empathy with grace, in that, you know, I'm pretty similar to that I can find the silver lining in a lot of things. And I think it's important that to try and assume positive intent. I'm so glad you said that. Because that's exactly what I do. And I tell people that I work with, I will always assume positive, I will always assume the best of intent until you not until you unless you prove differently. I always assume that your efforts are with the best of intent to build things up and to make things better. I have to assume that I can't even imagine living the other intent. But I think I also have that growth mindset, which is important. But I agree with you 100% That positive intent. Oh look, I made another run that I might also have some raps but I won't share those with you on this podcast. I'll do that another time. Because I do like to rap. It's one of my favorite things as well, or at least listen to it. So I like to ride it. I only perform it for a select few. So maybe one of these days, I wrote a COVID Rap when I was a principal, I wrote a rap so that the teachers could differentiate between the different kinds of drills. Shelter in Place, I mean, yeah. Yeah, it's, it's a way I find amusement is is to, I wouldn't really call it rap. I was call it speaking, words that rhyme to a rhythm. How about that? I love that. And you know, you're showing right there as far as getting through the hard times. Laughter. Absolutely not taking yourself too seriously that you can have a good time. And another thing that I liked that you talked about right there, and it's something like, I know, for myself, when I'm having a hard time, or I'm just having a bad day, is reaching out and you talked about sending a text out to someone, or how can I help them, because when we look outside of ourselves, sometimes it takes the focus off of, you know, our problems live, we start caring about other people. And I've just found in my own world, that's helped me a little bit, get through those tougher times. And you know, a great way to monitor that is to be reflective, and listen to ourselves, and how many times do we say the word I or made? When we're talking to people? It's a lot unless you're intentionally aware of it. It's a lot. So again, making that effort when I communicate with somebody, I try not to say I look, there's another rhyme. I do, just like I just did, but it's just something to be reflective about. If you're trying to help someone, then why are you always saying I would do this? And I think you should do that. And this is what I did. So like you said, I like the way you said that getting outside yourself. What do you need? What kind of support would be helpful for you? It takes a lot of intention to take the word AI out of the conversation. Yes, it does. Now, you said like it an experience expert, do you have a specific like self reflection policy or program that you file for yourself? Or habit I should say? Out? I wish I could say yes, but no, I? I'm pretty much all over the place. I'm pretty sure I'm an ADHD adult. I'm not sure. But I'm gonna guess that. No, I just am a very quick responder, quick reactor, but a slow processor. So which can sound kind of like a dangerous combination, maybe not even a good leader, but it works for me. Because I know myself. So I know how to use that in leadership and in relationships. But I reflect a lot. When I'm alone, I will replay things which Jon Acuff would probably call it overthinking. Right. But I do I replay things and think, Okay, what could I have done differently? What have I learned from that? What do I need to remember for next time I interact with that person? Things like that. But no, I don't have a protocol. I don't have anything in paper. That's way. That's way too confining. No, I'm more spontaneous. fly by the seat of your pants kind of gal. When I taught Junior High. Yes, I turned in lesson plans. Because I'm also a rule follower, Brian, so I turned in. But the real lesson plans came in my head when I was driving to school. That's, that's what really happened. So I'm more of a spontaneous person. But I do use the Notes app on my iPhone all the time. So when I have a thought, or something that I need to remember, or something like that, I will put it in notes. So I tweet every Wednesday thing originally called Wednesday words, don't be jealous, because that's so original. And so when I have a thought or an idea, I just throw it down in my notes app. And then I keep track of things like that. No, I think, you know, I don't have a specific self reflection habit myself. But I think I'm a lot like you as well, where, whether it's a walk, or you got to cook and dinner, maybe it's not cooking dinner, it's not cooking dinner, or working out or anything like that. It's just a couple of minutes. And just thinking back upon the conversations or the experiences, so much growth can take place. I do probably most of my reflecting in the car. Because I like to drive in silence. And I think it's from having been on campus for so long that the noise, the lovely noise, don't get it wrong. But that silence really so when I drive I drive in silence and that's really when I think I'm the most reflective or if I'm out in nature and just hanging out that's when I get some of my ideas. I'm not gonna say they're all good Brian, but that's when I get my ideas. It takes me about 25 bad ideas to get to one decent one. But yeah, just peace and quiet is when I do most of my reflecting wherever that may be. But I guarantee you, it's not in the kitchen. Okay? Don't get it twisted. It's not in the kitchen. That's great. Now, if educators want to connect with you, what's the best way for them to connect with you? Well, I'm still fairly new on the social media platforms. So Twitter is probably the best way. And it's Dr. ANP. At Dr. Noda grow. I also have an email address, which it's a mouthful. It's Dr. Matthews, perez@gmail.com. And Matthews only has one tea. I'm told my grandfather dropped one in the sea. But there I go rhyming again. But in either one of those ways, you can email me or you can, you know, DM me on Twitter. I have a personal email, you can send it to talk about Amy at Yahoo. That's the one that tends to stick in people's heads. I used to have a different email of Mensa way back in the day. I mean, I'm old, so we're gonna say at least 30 years ago, but I was not a member of Mensa. But I wanted to be so I made that up. And then I realized that in Spanish, that means stupid girl. So I changed my email address. So there you go, don't you I'm a word nerd. I love it. I love it. Now, if there's one takeaway that you would love everyone to walk away with, what would that be? That's a hard question. Because I have so many, so many things that I want people to know. But probably my biggest takeaway would be I'm gonna circle back, Brian, I hate to be a broken record. But the biggest takeaway would be there are no special education students. There are students, period, end of story, see people as people, not as their labels, and with coworkers see people as people not as the job they do, you know, see them as what they contribute and what they, how they add value to you, as a person, maybe also in your job duties. But that would be my biggest takeaway, see people for the person and the values and the qualities that they have, not as their shortcomings or limitations or labels or titles, that would probably be the biggest takeaway today. Ask me again, tomorrow, I'll have a different answer. That That is fantastic. And Dr. Perez, I just want to thank you so much. You have you know, at the beginning, you said taking a chance, it's not about taking chances about having a phenomenal conversation with a phenomenal person. And well, thank you so much. Yeah, thank you for you know, you brought so much energy and so much wisdom. And there's so many fantastic takeaways here. So I appreciate what you gave us appreciate. You know, you're in Texas. I'm in New York, but we're all one big, you know, family all you know, I always say we're on that same team, we're on that same mission and appreciate what you do. Dr. Pres. Thank you. So well. Thank you, Brian. And if, if you're a learner, then we're all in. But then we're all in one big happy family. If you're a learner, then we're a family of learners, no matter where you live, if you're willing to learn. You're my crew. That's it. Absolutely. So keep up the great work, Dr. Perez. Thank you, Brian. Appreciate the time. I hope you enjoyed that conversation as much as I did. Dr. Perez brought the joy, which also brought that wisdom as well. And this is the teaching champions take where I'm gonna share three of my favorite takeaways from this conversation. And the first gem that I loved is that she talked about seeing the strengths of our students, and seeing the strengths of our colleagues as well. And sometimes we get caught up so much in seeing other's weaknesses, that we miss out on seeing their shine. But if we can see their shine, and we can put them in positions where that shine can help them flourish. We're creating a better classroom, we're creating a better school. The second gem that I loved is when she talked about communication, and being a better communicator is something that we should all be striving to do. And Dr. Perez said that we should focus on making our messages clear and concise. And she didn't stop there, though. She talked about part of being a communicator is being a great listener. And part of being a good listener. You is paying attention to your students paying attention to your team. And understanding that if your message isn't being received, how we would like it, then we need to revise it. And think about how we can send it in a better way that fits the needs of those that we're communicating with. The third gem that I loved is how she has such an insatiable desire to learn. And she said that she wants to learn so much. And she doesn't want that learning to stop with her that she uses that knowledge. And she lets it flow to others to help lift them up. Now, these are just a few of my favorite takeaways from this interview with Dr. Perez. But let me know about your favorite takeaways hit me up on social media, and share what stood out to you. And as we're wrapping up, I just want to give a quick shout out to the road to awesome family. Encourage each and every single one of you if you have a story that you would like to share, because we all have stories, and we can all learn from one another. But if you have a story, and you ever thought about writing a book, reach out to Dr. Darren Peppard at the road to awesome, I'll leave his the information in the show notes below. And I just want to say, a special thank you to Dr. Perez, for joining us today and sharing so much with all of us. And I also want to say thank you to all you, I appreciate you. And if you think someone would benefit from this message, please share the teaching champions community is all about supporting, encouraging, lifting each other up. And always remember, whether you're from rural America, to urban America, to Canada, to Spain to Bahrain, we're all on that same team. We're all on that same mission. And we're always better together. Keep being amazing, my friends, and as we go out into the week may step into your strength, may you step into your shine, and let's build our champions up. Have a great week, everybody