Reflection, Growth, and Past Experiences

I'm Brian Martin. I'm a second grade teacher who find so much joy and fulfillment in what I do. Being in the classroom for almost 20 years, I know all about the time, effort and energy that you are continuously pouring into those you serve. That's why each week, I'm going to bring you an inspiring message to give you a little joy, and help fill your cup back up. Thank you for being here, and welcome to the teaching champions podcast. What's going on everybody, I hope this finds you striving and thriving and doing absolutely amazing. It was a good week, my friends, a cold one, but a good one. Last year teaching fully remote, I didn't venture out of the house too much during the wintertime. And this week, when I went out to the car, and it said negative 16. I said to myself, that I definitely didn't miss having to come out to a cold car in the morning. Outside of it being chilly this week, though. It was a great week, the champion showed up, they rocked it. And I had the opportunity to connect with Dr. Chad Lange, on the learning with interesting people podcast, it was an awesome conversation. Dr. Lang is a great guy. And his podcast is pretty awesome. It dives into how people learn and how their life experiences have helped shape their learning process. He's done interviews with people from a lot of different walks of life. And that brings a lot of different perspectives is one of my favorite podcasts to listen to. So if you're looking for a new podcast, definitely check out the learning with interesting people podcast. And today, I want to talk about a recent experience that was really meaningful to me. And it's one where there was a lot to unpack, in this experience, steps away from the class. And it dives more into a personal one. But as I look back at it, there was a lot that I took away from it. And I think hopefully it gives you something to think about. Hopefully, it makes you think a little bit makes you think about your own personal experiences. Reflection is the key to growth. And we can learn so much if we just step back and look at our own experiences, whether it's professionally or personally. Now a few weeks ago, I was doing work around the house, and my phone dings for text. I pick up my phone and read the text, and a wave of emotions comes over me. My friend that I served with in the military overseas, sent me a text and asked me if I would take part in a ceremony to promote him to staff sergeant. Now, this might not seem like a big deal to you. But I can't put into words how much this meant to me the honor to be asked to participate in something like that. So this past weekend, I traveled down to my old reserve unit to participate in the ceremony. In the little context. I was in the Army Reserves for six years. But during that time, between trainings and being activated, I spent close to two and a half years on active duty. The company that I went overseas with, we spent almost four months training together in the States before going overseas for a year. In my six year contract was up exactly when my company came home. That final formation when we pulled back into the reserve unit after 16 months together. And we stepped off those buses. And we all stood together. One last time as our families were there watching. And the commander said dismissed. That was the last time I wore a uniform. It was the last time that I saw 98% of those people that I just basically spent every day with for the past 16 months. And for me, there is no See you in a few months at the next row. And being one of the few people in the world who is on Facebook. I've unfortunately lost connections with so many amazing people. So going back to the reserve unit. After all this time was a big deal for me. And now night before I headed down, my wife said, you know, you're going to get emotional. And I said, Please, I'm not going to get emotional. Well, as much as I hate to admit it, the wife was right. Saturday morning came around. And I was lucky because they made the ceremony at one, I hopped in the car, pulled into the local gas station, and filled my car. And as I'm standing there pumping gas, that's when the first rush really came over me. It was a little jolt of excitement, brought back many memories of doing the same things. On some really early Saturday mornings. I jumped in the car, and started my journey for about an hour and a half down some roads that I haven't traveled down in, except for maybe once or twice in the last 15 years. And as I'm going there are so many motions, so many memories raced through my mind. And the closer I got to the unit, the more my heart started to race a little. And I pulled up to the unit. And I saw the parking lot filled with the military vehicles. And it was just a rush of memories came over me. My buddy met me in the parking lot. And we walked in. And there were a few faces that hadn't seen in almost 15 years. And we stood around and we laughed, we brought up some good memories, tried to catch up on some of the other soldiers that we served with. And then we had the ceremony. It was short. But to be able to stand in front of a friend, someone you consider a brother, and put their staff sergeant rank on was unbelievable. And after the ceremony, we stood around and we talked for a while. And then I had at home and the ride home. It was quiet. And there was a lot to think about. And these are a few reflections that came to my mind as I drove down these country roads. And the first one was changes inevitable. That old saying that the only thing certain in life is death, taxes and change. When I pulled up to that reserve unit, it was the same building that I had spent so much time. And as you walked in, the setup was almost exactly the same. The same office spaces, the same equipment areas, that same pot machine. But it wasn't the same. Even though there was a handful of people that were still there. By and large. It was brand new people. It was the same drill Hall, filled with a lot of memories. But that's all they were now. And it reminded me of something that I recently read about from actor Denzel Washington, he said that he never watches his movies from start to finish. He says once he shoots them, he moves on to the next thing. He says that he's always looking ahead, that he doesn't want to get trapped in the past and past roles. And sometimes, we can get caught up in the past and wanting to live in the past. But change is inevitable. Those chapters have already been written, some are happy that they're over. Others we wish we could go back. We can love those chapters, we can cherish those chapters, we can look back and joke around about them a friend that we share those moments with. But ultimately, we're writing a new chapter today. And it's important that we're present, that we embrace the page that we're writing today, and continue to move forward. And the second reflection I had in my car ride home was when we can use the past to grow from, we should always be looking to grow. We're never finished product. And I've learned more things looking back on my military career than I unfortunately did when I was in it, from leadership, to working with others to self discovery. There's been a lot. I've learned from the many failures. And I've also learned from the successes as well. And there's so many lessons from our past that go on learn, because we don't take the time to reflect. So take that time to think about what was happening in those moments. Where was your headspace at in that moment? What did you do? What do you wish you would have done? How would you handle that today? Many of us like to read in order to grow. But sometimes the lessons that we can learn the most from aren't found within the pages of a book The rageous lessons are in your own life experiences. So take time and think of some of your own memories, and what you can learn from them. A third thing I thought about on my way home is the power of owning our mistakes, and forgiveness. As I said, there were a handful of guys that I was in the unit with that were still there. And we were standing around talking after the ceremony. And the one soldier asked if you could speak to me privately. And we went off to the side. And he gave a heartfelt apology for something that happened almost 15 years ago. It wasn't for anything that he had done to me directly. But it's something that he has had to carry with him for the past 15 years. And he was very honest, he was truthful, he was sincere. And I looked at him, and I told him, that I accept your apology. But he didn't owe me anything. I said, I'm just blessed to have the opportunity to see you again. We all have things from our past that we wish we would have done differently. Words that we have come to regret saying actions that we wish we wouldn't have done or done differently. taking ownership of these moments, and letting those we may have wrong know, in a sincere way that we apologize for what we did is important. We may be forgiven, we may not be forgiven. But at the end of the day, we can take a little weight off our shoulders that we've been carrying. And at least you know, on your end, that if you give that apology, the if you own it, and that you tried to make amends, then you can live with that. On the flip side of that is forgiveness. And I'm going to be the first to say that every situation is different. Rarely is anything just black and white. Usually there's a lot of shades of grey. And in that moment, it would have been easy for me to avoid having anything to do with my friend. When I saw him last weekend, I could have carried animosity towards him. But how would that have served me? It wouldn't have years ago, he was in a different season of his life. His actions were never about me or anybody else. He was trying to do what he thought was right for him at the time. And leading with a little empathy and understanding of where he was coming from allowed us to have a great conversation, and allowed us to share some laughs. And when I told him that I was blessed to see him, it was something that I truly met. More than likely, I will never see him again. And I would rather have our last interaction be positive than a negative one. I heard a speaker say one time that we should treat every interaction that we have with someone as if it is the last time that we will ever see them. And that makes you think a little bit in the last reflection that I want to share is something that I share with my students. It's about celebrating others in fighting those little twinges of jealousy at the same time. When I got that text, I'm not lying when I said how much it meant to me. But I won't be telling the truth. If I didn't let you know that there was some small piece of me, that was a little jealous as well. When we're young, we have big dreams, we map out everything in our head, we picture certain things. And rarely do they go exactly as planned. And there was a period of my life when I had big goals for myself in the military. And I wanted to achieve the rank of Staff Sergeant. But I only made the rank of sergeant. So there was a little moment of jealousy mixed in with pride and joy for my friend. And I think we can have moments of jealousy. And at the same time, be proud and happy for others. It's easy to look around and see what's happening in other's lives, what is posted on social media, etc. And think, why do they deserve all that and not me? Those feelings aren't always easy to deal with. But we never know what is going on with others behind closed doors. And second, I've always found that it helps us out if we lead with joy and happiness for others rather than resentment. And I recognize those jealous feelings within me for what they were I sat with them, I worked through them. And I can't put to words the joy it was to see the pride in my friend's face. As he was promoted, he earned it and proud of them. And more importantly than being a great soldier. He's a great father. And that's what I'm most proud of them for. I know this episode straight away from teaching a little bit today. But there's so many lessons that we can learn from our experiences. And some, we can bring into the classroom. Some we can bring into our own personal life. But we should always be looking to learn and grow from them. Thank you for being here. I appreciate your time. If you could subscribe rate and review the podcast, I'd be extremely grateful, as it helps other educators see the podcast and be on the lookout for many episodes that I'm going to be releasing on Wednesday mornings. And it's all about hopefully bringing a little encouragement and a little joy to you midweek. Also, if you think someone would benefit from this message, then please share it with them. The teaching champions community is all about supporting, encouraging, and lifting each other up. And always remember, it doesn't matter whether you're from rural America, to urban America, to Canada, to Spain to Bahrain, we're all on that same team. We're all on that same mission. And we're always better together. And my challenge for you this week, is to take some time, find a quiet space, maybe take a ride in the car and reflect. You have a journey that is special to you. Take time to smile those memories. To laugh a little bit at them and to learn and grow from them. Keep being amazing, my friends. And as we go out into the week, May you step into your strength, may you step into your shop and let's build our champions. Have a great week everybody