Detach from School Stress: 5 Ways Teachers Can Enjoy a Worry Free Winter Break

 Okay educator friends, have you been literally counting down the days, the hours, the minutes until winter break and now it's here and ugh, you're laying awake at night feeling guilty about not working, you're worrying about your inbox overflowing, all the things, basically You are not present with your family.

What you're doing is still, even though you're not physically at school, your mind is at school and you're annoyed by it, frustrated about it. If so, then this is the episode for you this week. It's going to be a short one because I want you to spend your time enjoying your winter break. But here it is.

We're going to talk about what you already know. It's super important that what you need to do over winter break is rest and refuel, period, so that you can be the best of yourself for when you go back in the new year. And even though you're human, how can you do that? I have five easy  Tips, follow along five easy tips and one really bonus.

That is a mindset shift that you are going to have to make, but that I believe you can make. So buckle up, here we go. It's going to be a quick one. It's going to be a great one.  Welcome to the Balance Your Teacher Life podcast, where we talk all things avoiding educator burnout, setting healthy boundaries, and achieving better work life balance. 

If you're passionate about education, but tired of it consuming your whole life, you have found your home in the podcast universe. I'm your host, Grace Stevens, and let's get going with today's show. 

Here we go. Five steps for teachers to have a worry free and restful winter break. Five steps and an excellent bonus tip. Now listen, before we get going, I'm just going to say this quickly so that I don't get sidetracked.  And to be honest, so that I don't get too emotional, I just want to send out a huge thank you to everybody who reached out to me.

If you listened to last week's podcast, I went off on a tangent. It wasn't something I really ever anticipated talking about. But you know, my commitment is to show up as myself authentically and so to everybody who reached out and just sent me good wishes for my partner who had a really  horrible accident last week and he is going to be okay.

Listen, he's going to be okay. We are going to be okay. I know that every day we're making progress with pain management, in figuring out a new routine, figuring out what our new normal is. And I do believe this is finite, but  Anyway, thanks for reaching out. I really appreciate that. I'm going to address it a little bit at the end, because it's absolutely going to have to change the trajectory of what I am doing for at least the next three to six months, because basically  we're not going to be leaving the house.

You know what? And I'm okay with that. So anyway that's an aside. Thanks to everybody who reached out. I, I truly appreciate it, but let's get to the tips. Five tips. Okay. Tip number one should be obvious. Oh my gosh. These things should be obvious, but they're so hard to do. I get it. Oh my God. I, I remember, okay, quick anecdote, you know, come on now.

If you have not listened to episode 13. So episode 13, I went into a deep dive on how to calm the holiday. Chaos in the classroom. And I told the story about, you know, showing the Polar Express, like it was just way too long, all the things, right? So, trying to make things perfect and magical and everything, I know how it is, right?

And then, you know, probably you decorated your classroom, you want to get all that done. Deal. All the things that you planned you want to do before the end of school. And it's a lot. It's a lot, right? You're trying to balance all of that and trying to do, you know, the holiday shopping and, you know, come on, it falls mostly on us.

I hate to say a lot of us are, you know, women in education and we've got to do all the things. We've got to take care of not only all our gifts, our gifts for our, our spouses, family.  All the activities. So there is a lot going on this time of year, but here's tip number one Just finish as much as you can before you leave.

Okay, get the kids involved Okay, if okay if they're tinies and it's gonna they're gonna cry pulling down You know their reindeer and their lettuce to Santa off the wall. Okay, I get it Don't get them involved, but if they're older, hey kids help me Fix up this room before we leave, right? We want a fresh start in January.

Just pull it down, send it home. I always told even my little first graders, Oh hey, your parents are not going to want these crafts. Let's pack them up and send them home. So I would try and at least deal with clean walls before I went home. Right? Get as much done.  You know, lesson plan as much as you can for the first week when you're coming back because when you want to leave, You want to leave.

So do as much as you can. Even though the, you know, the temptation is Oh my gosh, after that last, you know. A few kids straggling out at the party. Just get yourself home. No, just try it and leave it in reasonable, calm, kind of organized, leave Christmas, leave holidays, whatever we want. Leave it behind, pack it away before you leave.

Even if it means you need to spend an extra half hour, just pack it away. Throw it away. Just throw it away. So that when you leave, you have a clean slate to come back to in January. Okay. So that's tip number one.  Number two is set expectations. Let everybody know. You know, on your email, put an out of office.

On your class dojo, or whatever your communication app is. I'm suggesting not only do you put an out of office, I'm suggesting for all that's holy, Take those apps off your personal device, your phone, just take them off, uninstall them. Oh my gosh, then I'll have to reinstall them. Who cares? That takes less than three minutes to reinstall them.

Just take them off. You don't want to see the messages piling up. Set a boundary. You deserve to rest and recuperate. Just as much as everybody else. Right? For a lot of you, it's almost coming up to, you know you know, halfway point is usually through January. But really, by December, we've just had the craziness of conferences and winter programs and, you know, all the grading period.

Like, you just need to totally rest. So that's it. Take the apps off your phone. Alright? So that's two. So, number three. Listen,  less is more, less is more. Go back to episode 13 if you haven't listened to it. Here were some strategies I had. One was, you know, survey your family. What is the most meaningful, enjoyable activity that we do over the holidays?

Right, for one kid it might be baking the cookies, for another it might be driving around in the car on your PJs, watching the holiday lights.  It might be if you're, you know, your kids are grown and flown, or maybe you don't have kids, you know, maybe it's volunteering, whatever, survey everybody. Don't try and do all the things.

If you're running around trying to do  20 activities, you are enjoying none of them. Right? All you're doing is getting yourself frustrated. Probably like most teachers, you have a little bit of, you know, perfectionism going on. You want it to be magical for everybody. Just choose. You'll be surprised. I always was surprised at what my kids wanted to do.

Like, if you could only do one thing, what would be the most meaningful to you? Okay, so then do less. Do less. Try and make it easy. Right. Try and make things easy. Okay. So that's number two. Number one was finish as much as possible before you leave. Set the boundaries. Take off the apps off your phone.

Number two. Less. Survey your home, your kids, your partner. Your immediate family, whoever you're spending the holidays with, less is more. Don't assume just because you've always done it, that they even give a darn about it. Okay? There's no other way to say it. Right, holiday baking for me, super stressful.

Kitchen a mess, kids a mess, you know, get down to it, they didn't even care. Mom, can we just like, you know, go by the, you know, the, the log?  The cookie log where you just slice off the cookies and it has like a, you know, kind of like a a picture of a Christmas tree or something already in it. They were perfectly happy with that.

Like, make it easy, okay? Make it easy. Alright, now, so, number three.  While we are on the subject of less. Here's what I'm going to tell you. We've got to focus on what we can control. Okay, we're going to talk about this in the next  kind of strategy about what do we do when we start worrying about school.

But here's the big thing. For number three, I'm going to tell you  less social media. Please,  please listen to me and please believe me on this, especially at this time of year. Take the pressure off yourself. Oh my goodness. Like, you all know, I'm like pretty crap at social media. You know, and that's by design.

I find it not particularly helpful for my mental health. You know, would it have helped me grow my business? Of course it would have. Like how, over the years, let me tell you how many people are like, how do you ever expect to sell books? How do you ever expect to reach more people? You need to do social media.

You know, do I? anD especially Instagram, which I feel is just like You know, this most curated version of this perfection of this life that nobody is living. So that's number one is there are standards that, you know, this whole curated people putting their best day of their lives forward. When I think of how I used to torture my family every year to try and get the perfect family photo, like they literally, it was like pulling teeth.

And as adults now they're like, mom, can we just not? We never want to do that again. Like we were miserable doing that. So like let go of this whole kind of fake perfection thing that you keep seeing on social media. So that's number one. And number two, the bigger, the bigger issue is you're like, Oh, I've got time.

I can hang out on TikTok. I can hang out on Insta or, you know, whatever. I've got time. It's relaxing.  I gotta tell you, it's not, it really isn't. If you are engaged in social media, it's like an on and just, it, it's designed to be addictive. It's in designed to get engagement. And what gets engagement is trauma and drama for the most part.

Okay. It's one of the reasons that I tell people to steer clear of the news cycle. Right? If you really feel like the world is going to come to an end, if you are not hypervigilant and know what's happening in the world, then turn on the news for a few minutes, get what you need to know, and then get out of there because the news cycle is designed only to do two things.

Now, I know I'm going to alienate some of you with this, and it's probably a topic for a whole nother podcast. But. I'm telling you, as somebody who comes from a different cultural background, that the media, especially in the United States, is only designed to do things. Be afraid and buy stuff. Okay, be afraid and buy stuff.

That's what it is. It is like drinking trauma from a fire hose. Your nervous system does not have the capacity to be concerned about the whole world.  Okay, there was a time. Back in the day, we all know about the fight or flight response, right? When we lived in little communities and we, all we worried about was our immediate little tribal community, we had fight or flight response if there was, you know, we always say the saber toothed tiger, but if there was imminent danger coming, right?

Our nervous system has the capacity to process trauma, drama, fear, danger when we're in a small community. It has not caught up to the point where it can absorb the trauma. of the entire world. It's just too much. And especially as educators who we are drawn to care so much and to want to have impact so much.

It is just  the absolute antithesis of relaxing and recuperating and resting and doing what we need to do for authentic self care, right? Which we know is really important for student outcomes that we show up as our best selves.  every day and especially in the new year after this restful period. Okay, so please believe me on that.

I know some of you, if you're younger, you're going to be like, you're going to roll your eyes at me and I'm going to sound like a really old person, like, oh my gosh, listen to this lady going off on social media. Trust me, scientifically validated. It is engineered for engagement, a quick dopamine hit, more, more, more, more.

You watch the one video, oh that was fun, and you know, you, come on, you don't need me to tell you. Pick up your phone, you say I'm gonna, you know, set a timer, maybe I'm gonna spend five minutes, ten minutes on TikTok, and you've wasted an hour and then you're annoyed at yourself, and you're not relaxed, you're jacked up. 

Okay, so that's tip number three. Is less social media. All right, now here's number four.  Just decide that you're going to have a power hour or a power afternoon and it's going to be towards the end of winter break, right? And you're going to say any time that something comes up, like I always, I call this my Sunday problems.

Right. When we used to have the you know, kind of the weekend blues I would dedicate an hour on Sunday at the end of the day to make sure I had lesson plans done or whatever. So my strategy was anytime anything came up, a concern, a worry Oh my gosh, I have to do this. I just jotted it down, whatever, made them, made a physical note and put it somewhere.

And I told myself. That's a Power Hour problem. That's a Sunday problem, right? You're going to designate a block of time that you are going to work before you go back to school to make sure you're prepared with lesson plans, with grading, with all the things that you need to do that you might have been putting off, but you are going to designate when that time is. 

It's going to be towards the end of winter break. And any time something comes up that you think you need to deal with, you're going to say, that's a Sunday problem. That's a power hour problem. And that's it. It's done. Delegate it to them. Push it out to them. It's better to spend three hours on the last day of winter break  or the Friday before the end of winter break, whatever you decide.

Three hours than to steal yourself of joy and presence with your family every day during winter break. And that's what's going to happen. You're going to worry about it all the time, right? So that's a good strategy. Decide on a time. Right? And when, when the thought comes up, the worry comes up, the concern comes up, the fantastic idea comes up, right?

Maybe when you're really relaxed, you have these amazing ideas. Oh my God, this will be a great unit of study. Oh my gosh, my students have been getting it this way. Let's try it that way. Right? When you're really relaxed, you have fantastic ideas. Chop them. Just make a note in your in your phone. or a physical note.

I always like stick notes, you know, and, and just put it off, work on it then. Okay. So that it's better to spend half a day, even half a day working than to worry about it, to do a little bit every day during the break, because let me tell you what your family really  I always said presence, C E, over presence.

  There was no point. I mean, there was a, if you, if you know my story, you know that there was a point that I worked  in the corporate world and I made a pretty significant amount of money especially compared to when I was teaching and I could afford to buy my kids nice things. And I grew up with very little. 

I mean, I'm not going to give some sob story, but you know, compared to what I could provide for my kids, very little. Okay. And so there was a tendency to want to really buy them nice stuff cause I'd never had that. And I really learned very quickly that there was no point in putting really expensive fun things under the tree and then being so stressed out that I wouldn't even play with them.

Or sit on the floor and engage with them or read with them or just, just hang out with them. Right? So I learned really quickly, and I'm really glad about that, that I learned what my kids really wanted was my presence. They wanted me to be present with them, to be engaged, to be interested in what they were interested in, rather than, you know, material things.

Okay? And so really focusing on giving them your full attention. And not just being engaged with your phone is really what they want, okay? So,  that's three and four, power hours four. Okay, alright, let's summarize so far before I get to number five. I promised I was trying to keep it quick. Number one, finish as much as possible as you can.

Take the apps off your phone,  right? Number two, less is more, right? Just less is more. Survey, decide to do less. Survey what your family wants to do. Number three, stay off the social media  as much as you can and off the news cycle, realizing that it's not really relaxing, right? We want to focus on what we can control.

Right, and what you can control is how much fun, how much engagement you're having with your family, right, that you're being present with people. Okay, so number four is instead of worrying about work every day, even if it's fantastic new ideas, like set aside a power hour, a power,  a hot afternoon, whatever.

And every time something comes up, you're going to say, that's a, like I said, I always did it for Sunday evening. I was like, that's a Sunday problem. Okay, now number five. Easier said than done, I understand.  Really recharge,  okay? Really recharge. So, that means, you know, staying away from social media, you don't need to have perfect pictures, it's okay to have a PJ day.

It's okay, your kids will find it fun. Hey, nobody got dressed today, right? While you have a bit of time, make sure the meals are kind of healthy. You got time to cook a little, even though there's so many treats around at Christmas. Try and engage in really some nice comfort food. Try and get some rest, you know, take advantage of the fact that you can go to bed early, you can snuggle, you can watch movies in bed, you're gonna fall asleep, who cares, right?

So, really try and recharge. But, at the same time, try and have something to look forward to every day.  Because I do find the tendency is, we are so exhausted by the time winter break comes by, that we like spend three days in a coma, just laying on the couch with a blanket, and then we're kind of frustrated at ourselves, like, oh my gosh, I really wanted to enjoy my winter break and not just be in this complete kind of recovery where I can't get off the couch for a week.

So even if it's just something small. Something to look forward to every day. And especially make that like a connection thing with other people. Okay, so here's my quick summary statement. Number one, finish as much before, as possible before you leave. Have the students help you, right? Take the apps off your phone.

Number two, less is more. Number three.  Presence over 

presents 

okay, and limit your social media and news intake. Number four, have your power hour, your dedicated time that you're going to work on school, and then anything that comes up, just delegate to there mentally. And number five, really recharge, but trying to have something to look forward to every day.

Okay, so here's the bonus tip. Because, I'm telling you, especially  with it being towards the end of the year, oh my god, if this wasn't a PG rated podcast, I would say F what happens in the new year. What happens in the new year? You're gonna see it everywhere. New year, new you! You don't need a new you.

You don't need a million resolutions what you need is some, a couple of solid good habits, okay? So stay away from that like,  massive temptation to like, Oh I'm gonna make these, oh these new resolutions, next year's gonna be different.  And then you know by January 6th you're already down on yourself because you've blown them all.

So we're gonna talk about a lot in the new year, some new habits, okay? So just  Stay away from that. Nobody needs a new you. We need the old you, the old you that was when you started teaching, that you were so excited to be with students, you were confident, you know, that you could have an impact, right? 

Where people in your life felt treasured and appreciated, not like massively neglected, right? That was the old you. That was the best of you, right? So we don't need a new you. We just need to help you find your way back to your old new, okay? So there's that. So I've got something to really help you with that.

Next week I'm really pleased, like this lady that I'm going to interview her name's Casey and I've got to tell you she's kind of a big deal. She has been interviewed by every media outlet. She has a, she has helped literally thousands of, of women in particular. So don't not tune in if you're not a woman, but she does specialize in helping women and it's a very taboo subject and it's literally,  I'm just going to tell you, but I don't, I do want you to tune in.

It's going to be about dry January. You know what that is? So I really feel that like in teaching culture you know, I have three different wine glasses that people are giving me that say literally lesson planning juice on there. Right? Like, I do think it's a taboo subject, nobody wants to talk about that, some, for some of us, we really look forward to, you know, unwinding with friends over wine or beer or whatever, but it is turning into something.  When teachers were so stressed and were so overwhelmed, if we're really starting to rely on alcohol as a need to cope, thEn looking into what I like to call sober curious  it's, you know, is, is how can I reduce drinking?

Not like, Oh my gosh, you're all alcoholics. Let's stop drinking. But like, what are some ways to maybe limit it to have a new relationship with it? And the lady I'm interviewing fin that's going to publish next week is 100%.  A really good, trusted, true expert on that. She kind of is a big deal and I'm really glad she agreed to be on the podcast.

So, that might be something new if you're interested in getting back to your old you. So, okay, that's where we're at with that. Again I want everybody to have a wonderful, restful break. However you celebrate, wherever you celebrate. Just really make the most of it with your family. And friends, your family of choice.

Those are friends are your family of choice, right?  And again, I want to say thank you to everybody who sent me a message. Please, you know, don't worry about me. We will be fine.  We will get through this,  you know.  It's bringing us closer, honestly, as a couple. Not things we'd ever imagined we would be doing together, but we are.

And it, you know, I remind myself it is finite, however, you know, it does mean I'm not going to be leaving the house for a long time. So my commitment is 100 percent I have dialed back on working. My commitment is still to get my podcast out every week.  That's a great way for people to get actionable items, so I'm really committed to that.

I was going to publish a new book next year. I'm putting that on hold, but what I am going to do is republish a book I published this year, and I was really lazy when I published it. I just threw it out there and hoped it would stick. And, you know, of course it's got buried. I think it's two million and something in the Amazon algorithm.

So I'm going to relaunch that. That I can do. And also some of you may know that, you know, this podcast is, it's, it has the same name as a signature course I have called Balance Your Teacher Life, which is a, it's a fantastic course for any teacher who wants to get their life back in balance and want some coaching along the way.

And so you know, that course is already done. I've run a cohort of it. So all of that is done. And so my only commitment. But that would be supporting new students. So that's going to be relatively easy for me. That's a coaching call a month. So  I'm absolutely going to relaunch that in January. So if you think you have interest in that, that is really a way to up level your skills.

I'll tell you that. So anyway, so that will be happening next year. But as far as some other initiatives I had, they're going to be on hold, but it's okay. This podcast will still be here. No worries. All right. So with that, I want to wish you, you know, a wonderful winter break. Even if you're not listening to this during winter break, who cares?

These are still good strategies just for your weekend, right? To designate a power hour, presence over presents, all these things. Okay. So until next time, as always. Create your own path, bring your own sunshine and be well.